What is the green stuff leaking from my butt??

The other day, I forgot a pen in my jeans pocket and threw it in the laundry. Normally I check all pockets, but that damn Murphy's Law never fails to amaze me. So when I'm pulling laundry out, there are big black inkstains on my underwear.

Now the underwear is plain old boring white cotton stuff (OMG, I'm turning into my mother), so I throw it all in the wash again on hot with plenty of bleach. Good to go. R ends up being the one to dry it and put it away, and I promptly forget about it.

So on Tuesday, I get dressed and get on with life. And inevitably, I need to go to the bathroom sometime after that, so I go.

And wonder just what the green stuff leaking out of my butt and all over the underwear could possibly be???

I have a slight momentary freak out while I consider all the possibilities. I'm really an alien and this is af. My apparent sinus infection has morphed itself to my nether regions. I'm OBVIOUSLY suffering from a serious brain infection and THIS is how it's showing itself!

Yeah, the last one is the most likely scenario FOR SURE!

And then it dawns on me. The pen. Black ink. And bleach that apparently only turned black ink green and didn't take it out.

Genius. What can I say? Simply genius.