Why girls should not wear dresses

Or perhaps I should call this "Thinking Outside the Box".

H came home from school to today with a "ME Flower". They are doing "Getting to Know You" in kindergarten this week. The ME Flower was a flower with several petals on it, and they were to color petal 1 with the color of their shirt, petal 2 with the color of their pants, petal 3 with the color of their eyes, and so forth.

H wore a red & white striped dress to school today. No shirt. No pants.

So upon looking at her colored flower, I asked her how she chose the colors for her flower.

Petal 1 - the shirt - was colored red. She said she just chose red and didn't want to do red & white stripes.

Fair enough.

Petal 2 - the pants - was colored pink. I hesitated momentarily, then asked why she chose pink.

My darling daughter yanked up her dress and SHOWED me why she chose pink.

"CUZ MY PANTIES ARE PINK, MOM, WHY DO YOU THINK?"

Well of course. How could I be so dense? :)

Having your cake.....

So the little guy turned one yesterday. ONE. How on earth did that happen? Has it really been an entire year since he was born?

We did a frog-themed birthday, or as much of a frog theme as you can do when nobody DOES frog birthday stuff! I made his cakes - the left is his smash cake, which he pretty much only licked the icing off of. The right is his "big" cake. The frog is a yellow pound cake; the pond is chocolate with vanilla filling. Delicious, if I do say so myself. I only had a few headaches with these cakes - namely when the arms decided to fall off. I managed to handle it by building him some "armpits" out of fondant to support the arms better. R laughed at me when I freaked out and got him to come hold the arms in place while making repairs. He told me it was kinda like watching the cake shows on Food Network when the cakes start falling apart as they move them and they make hasty repairs.

I took that as a compliment. ;)

In other news.... the initial cake was vaguely reminiscent of my grade 10 Biology class. You see, we dissected frogs. And my first cake fell apart when I took the pan off. Splayed itself wide open... legs out to the side, even the head was split. The kids LOVED it.... all this extra cake to eat!! Fortunately, I've made enough cakes by now to know things like this are bound to happen, and I had plenty of time to rebake the cake. Part of the problem was I attempted to create my own pound cake recipe and it just didn't work, so I went back to the tried and true one I usually use for shaped cakes. Much better.

It's so strange to me to see little boy toys everywhere! I don't know why that is - you'd think after a year I'd be ready for it, but nope.

I love it though!

Things you shouldn't mutter under your breath

We were late again last night. It was our anniversary and H had soccer practice. We just had takeout for dinner, but still, it was 9:30pm by the time the girls were going to bed.

I was cleaning out the guineapigs as R read H her bedtime story. On tap last night was her favorite book - "Why?". As I sat on the floor, R read "Why do cats eyes shine at night?".

I muttered under my breath, "Because someone shoved a flashlight up their ass" as I shoved Samson away from where he was trying to help me with the pigs.

R laughed.

H said, "What, Momma?".

I stupidly thought that was the end of it.

On the way to school today, H asks me, "Do cats have lights in their bums to make their eyes shine?".

I'll never learn.

(that is Blackberry, by the way. She's a little sweetie!)

So you think your house is babyproofed....

I'm rethinking my career as a daycare provider. I'm thinking that instead I may go into helping people spot the places that need to be babyproofed in their home. I have a sure fire method. Mind you, it may be shortlived as S won't always be this inqusitive.... will he?

This morning's tale of terror begins with a stinky poopy diaper. This wasn't your ordinary stinky diaper either. The child has been on a 90% grapes diet lately. OK, not really, but the one thing he eats with gusto is grapes. So he's eaten a lot. And let's face it, they really help get the poop chute going. Ugh.

Shortly after cleaning his bum up and getting him dressed, I released him as I normally do and set about my morning routine - getting coffee, greeting my daycare kids, that kind of thing. I was having a snuggle with 3yo A when I heard S start to cry. Not a "I'm hurt" cry either - more his "OK, I'm done with this" kind of cry. So I figured he'd be coming along shortly from wherever he was.

His crying didn't stop, so I went to investigate.

Now I WOULD have a picture of what I found to insert here, but I figured I better be a good mom and pick up my crying child instead of running for the camera. HOWEVER.... last night, R didn't turn the shower sprayer off after bathing the girls. And this morning, S turned on the hot water and the cold water and then turned the shower sprayer outside of the tub.

So I was faced with a flooded bathroom and a dripping wet child who was clearly no longer having fun. :)

All I really have to say at this point is thank GOD for concrete floors and the Hoover Floormate. No damage to anyone, my floor needed to be washed anyways (although I was thinking SLIGHTLY less wet methods), and S WAS lovely and clean again. I say WAS because he just crawled into here and it smells like he's dropped another grape bomb in his diaper.

Nature vs nurture my ass. The girls were NEVER like this! :)

You know it's going to be a long day....

I got up late. Jumped out of the shower, squinted at the clock, which I thought read 6:54am, and put my contacts in. As I did, I realized GMA had come on, which meant it was 7am or later.... and as I ran in complete nakedness for some underwear, I heard my first daycare kid at the front door.

S thought this was all very funny from his ringside seat.

My bra(s?) are all wet and in the wash. I forgot to hang them up last night. My shorts are filthy. I hear them knocking again. JEEZ, people, you like NEVER come before 7:05 these days - how did you know I was running late today? So I yank on a pair of fleece pajama bottoms (did I mention it's 80F already?) and throw on a t-shirt. I look simply ravishing. Hair unbrushed, braless.... definitely the clean, together look I strive for in the morning. **sigh**

But it gets better. I haul my braless, pajama clad self outside to start the sprinklers, completely forgetting that I mowed the yard yesterday. See, we don't have a bag on the riding mower, so the clippings are simply spread all over the yard. Not a good thing when the grass is dewey and you're wearing long pants... and have all the hoses hooked up to sprinklers! But I did manage to get sprinklers turned on without soaking myself, which is good. I did, however, turn my just-showered feet into something reminiscent of the Hulk..... but hey, the bottom of my jammies matched as well. Matter of fact, it appeared they had sprouted green hair. Fashion statement, perhaps?

Meanwhile, S has been loose in the house. In the approximately 8 seconds I was outside (ok, it was more like 3 minutes), he's managed to overturn my 54oz water cup, knock over the lamp, dump the container of breastpads on the floor, and get ahold of the TV remote. He was calmly sitting in front of the television in the living room with SIX channels playing on the TV. HOW THE HECK DID HE DO THAT? I know the install guy said it does picture in picture, but we've never been able to figure it out... yet my not-quite-1yo son does it? Insane... and further proof that you must be under age 10 to operate any kind of television device. ;)

He's soaked from the water. I stupidly picked him up, and now *I* am soaked from the water. Yet when he happily proclaims "Dad!", I can't help but laugh.

And did I mention we're out of coffee? **sigh**

Letting Go

H started back to school on Thursday. It was bittersweet, watching her walk into the room of kindergarteners and hang up her backpack like an old pro. We did the K4 program last year, so she was secure in going and I was pretty cool with her being there. H tolerated me taking pictures, but pretty much dismissed me once she got there, so I took a few pictures and left.

I felt pretty smug - after all, I saw other moms who were hanging around, not wanting to leave their babies. I saw children who were less than thrilled about there, and I remembered how I felt last year when H cried as I left. I came home and told R I could tell who was at school for the first time and who wasn't, just by how their parents behaved.

I picked her up Thursday as well, not wanting her to have to wait an hour on the bus to tell me about her first day. First thing she told me upon getting in the car? "C got in trouble for CRYING and had to go to the OFFICE!!!".

Wow. I bet HIS mom is proud... not. :) I never did quite figure out what happened, other than he apparently shoved someone in line... or something like that.

Typical of schoolchildren worldwide, when I asked what she did, she gave me the standard "Nothing"... followed by "I don't know" when asked about some of the kids in her class. I suddenly understood the frustration of my mother.... but I also remember giving her the same answers and honestly wondering what I was SUPPOSED to tell her! :)

So yesterday I drove her to school (half-day kindy, she's in the afternoon) and just dropped her off. She was okay with that. I wasn't. As I watched her walk up to the big red doors, wearing her red striped Tommy Hilfiger dress and Barbie backpack, I wanted to cry. I wanted to run over and hold her hand the whole way to her classroom. I wanted to be the moms I'd felt so smug about the day before, as I saw them walking their kindergarteners into the school for the second day.

But she turned and flipped me a wave as she walked in, and then she was gone, and I did the only thing I could do.... swallowed a sob and drove everyone else home for naps.

And then I watched the clock until the bus arrived.

And I was the embarrassing mom... the one who sat in the front yard for almost 30 minutes so I could see the bus coming. The one who wanted to skip down the driveway when I saw the yellow bus turn the corner to our street. The one who madly clicked the camera when the door opened and my kindergartener started down the steps.

The bus driver smiled.

I got the feeling I wasn't the only mom who did that. I may have been the only mom of a kindergartener who did it that day, but the driver smiled like it was old hat for her.

I did get a few more details out of her yesterday. When asked how the busride was, she said "FUN! But they were loud!". Of course, when I asked what she did at kindergarten, you know what she said....

"NOTHING!"

No, of course not.

The dog days of summer....

Today was a relatively cool 90F, so I sent the children out to play after lunch. I stayed inside with the glass door open and the screen door closed so that I could clean up. I could hear them out there, happy giggles, discussions on what color chalk to use.....

When I finished up and went out to see what they are doing, what do I find....

But 2yo R on all four, hunched over the dogs' water dish, lapping like crazy!!

I laughed and asked if he was thirsty. He lifted his dripping wet face out of the bowl, grinned, and shook his head NO as he ran off to play some more...

At least it was clean water... and I suppose that's better than drinking out of the toilet like the dogs like to.... :)

What I've Learned This Summer (so far)

I've been so proud of our beautiful lawn this year. We hired a lawn company to fertilize and weed, and I've dutifully watered through these triple-digit temps.

Our lawn is amazing. It's green. It's lush. And it's STILL FREAKING GROWING.

All around us, the neighbors have stopped mowing as their lawns are all brown. But oh no, not me. I stupidly thought a pretty lawn was IMPORTANT back when the warmest temps were low 80's. Now that it's 100+, who STILL HAS TO MOW THE DAMN YARD?

Certainly isn't my smart neighbor who's not only saved a ton on water and fertilizer, but also gets to sit inside and sip cool drinks while I see how fast the mower will go in an attempt to get a breeze happening.....

**sigh**

I think the heat is going to my head. Actually, I know it is, as this morning I found myself WANTING to run instead of taking it easy in the heat and walking in an attempt to get a cool breeze happening against my sweaty skin. There's something seriously wrong with that. :D

Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go move the sprinkler.

My son... the cannibal

Not quite 2yo L ( a daycare child) was very busy in the "house" corner of my daycare room this morning. She had a baby in the swing, a baby in the stroller, one tucked under her arm, and was busy "cooking" and handing plastic food to 11mo S... who would take it and chuck it behind him. (nothing like serving the man already, huh?)

After she'd given him pretty much all the plastic food, she stopped, looked at him, and proceeded to put one of the baby dolls in the "oven"... cook it.... and then handed that to my ds to "eat".

My son... the cannibal.

I love kids. They are so damn funny sometimes, and they have no idea just how hilarious they are.

Lucy in the Sky With Diamonds

Last night I was in the bath with A when she started singing "Lucy in the Sky With Diamonds".

Given that she's only 3 years old, I was a bit surprised. I called R in to listen to her and asked if he could believe it. He looked at me and asked how she knew that song.

Damned if I know.

So I did the obvious - I asked her. And sometimes the obvious is just TOO obvious, when it comes to three year olds! Our conversation went something like this:
Me: A, who taught you that song?
A: Lucy did!
Me: And where did you hear that song?
A: In the sky! (giggles)
Me: Did somebody sing that song, and you heard it?
A: MOM! Lucy taught me in the sky!

OK, apparently I'm not going to get anywhere with figuring it out! But honestly, I don't recall it being on the radio lately, *I* haven't been singing it, and it's not the kind of song the kids singers on Noggin would be singing.

I suppose I just need to figure out who Lucy is.... **sigh**